


An Afternoon in El Paso

by kalirush



Category: Blue Beetle (Comic)
Genre: Action, El Paso, Fish People, Flathead Catfish are Native to the Rio Grande, Gen, Talking to Yourself Except Not Really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-22
Updated: 2011-12-22
Packaged: 2017-10-27 19:04:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/299042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kalirush/pseuds/kalirush
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are fish people crawling out of the Rio Grande.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Afternoon in El Paso

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Perpetual Motion (perpetfic)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/perpetfic/gifts).



“I’m just saying,” Brenda was saying, “This seems kind of anticlimactic.”

Jaime shrugged. “I guess it sort of is,” he said. “But it’s nice to be back to normal, and not be running around spaceships with no pants.”

Brenda flopped back on his bed. “Right,” she said, making a face. “Anyway, I guess if you still want to grow up to be a dentist someday, then you _have_ to do that essay.” She grinned at him, gesturing toward the books and papers next to her.

Jaime covered his face with a hand. “I can’t believe Paco told you about that,” he said.

Brenda was still grinning. “I can’t believe you thought he wouldn’t,” she said. “I got a re-enactment, with a stick and everything.” Brenda put a finger to her lips, looking mock-thoughtful. “I bet _that’s_ why Traci hooked up with you- she must have a thing about oral hygiene!”

“Now you’re just being hurtful,” Jaime accused, throwing a pillow in her direction.

“Ha!” Brenda said, grabbing for the pillow. “You don’t want to start anything with me- I’m unstoppable! Your mom even said so.”

Jaime pointed a finger at her. “I took the Ultra-Humanite, and I can take you, too.” He paused. “Um, probably.”

Brenda threw the pillow at his head just as the scarab spoke up. _Jaime Reyes_ , Khaji Da said, his- its?- voice reverberating through Jaime’s mind as Brenda’s pillow thwapped into his face.

Jaime pushed the pillow aside, and went still. “What’s up?” he said out loud, ignoring Brenda’s funny look in his direction.

 _Incoming transmission [Paco]. Vocal stress detection=Paco is ‘freaking out’_. Jaime could feel the Beetle armor forming over his neck and ears as Khaji Da connected Paco.

 _“Hey- Jaime-”_

“What’s going on? You okay?” Off to Jaime’s side, Brenda tensed up, watching him.

 _“Well, you know how the other day, you were saying, ‘man, I wish there were more mutant fish men in my life’?”_ There was a shout in the background, and a strange groaning sound that Jaime couldn’t identify. Khaji Da started feeding him location information for Paco.

“Not really, no,” Jaime said.

 _“Well, you got some anyway. Me and the Posse are out at the border. You might wanna-”_ There was a thunking noise. _“Hey!”_ Paco shouted, probably not to Jaime. There was another thunk, and then- _“Just get your blue butt over here!”_

Paco disconnected.

 _Signatures Paco, Posse [Piñata Thumper Scour Damper] located,_ Khaji Da informed him. _Intercept?_

“What was that?” Brenda asked, at the same time. “Who were you talking to?”

Jaime shook his head. Sometimes, there were too many voices in it. “That was Paco,” he told her, heading for the door. Jaime ducked into the living room. “Mom?” he called. “There’s um- a thing. Down at the border. I need to go.”

She looked up from where she was sorting through groceries on the kitchen floor. “A Beetle thing?” she asked.

“Yeah,” Jaime said, nodding to Brenda. “Paco says there are mutant fish men.”

His mom made a face. “Monsters,” she grumbled. “Well- be careful? And if you’re not going to be home for dinner, try to call. Or- have the scarab call.”

 _Directive received; will enact in the case Jaime Reyes=incapacitated,_ Khaji Da promised. Jaime decided not to relay that to his mother. “I will,” he said, as the armor flowed into place around his body.

Brenda was already on the road by the time he made it into the air. “I don’t suppose I’m going to be able to tell you not to come along,” he told her through her commlink.

 _“Not a chance,”_ she said. _“Seriously, Paco’s in bad enough trouble to call you, and you think I’m staying behind?”_

“That’s pretty much what I thought,” he said, closing the connection.

\-----------------------------

There were fish people crawling out of the Rio Grande.

They looked basically humanoid in a two-arms-two-legs-and-a-head sort of way. Their skin had a bluish cast to it, though, and they were almost entirely hairless. Their eyes were round and bulbous, their mouths were wide and gaping, and they had fins protruding from various parts of their bodies. They were climbing from the river up onto the bridge, just before the place where it led into the U.S. customs station.

The bridge was in total chaos. Border Patrol agents stood between the fish people and the people people who were rapidly running away from their cars. The agents’ guns didn’t seem to be slowing the fish people down all that much, though. Also, fish people were apparently stronger than Jaime would have thought; he saw one of them rip the door off a now-unoccupied car with his bare, webbed hands.

Khaji Da started running down a list of non-lethal options. Jaime felt a slight glow of pride at that; there was a time when the scarab would have been suggesting that they firebomb the whole area, and never mind the civilians. “Alright,” Jaime said, considering his options. “Shock wave sounds good. Let’s try that.”

They dropped, hitting the bridge hard enough to shake it. There was a beat, and then the armor released a shock wave. It was nearly silent; only a dull _thwoom_ and the sound of people hitting pavement heralded the release. Jaime sprung into the air with all speed, pulling civilians clear of the bridge while the Border Patrol and the fish people struggled to their feet.

The scarab located Paco and the rest of the Posse without being asked. Jaime knew without looking that they were toward the Mexican end of the bridge, surrounded by a group of fish people with a group of civilians. _Intercept [Paco]_ , Khaji Da declared, firmly, and Jaime agreed. They turned at top speed, barrelling toward the other end of the bridge as one of the fish people broke the line and charged Paco.

In lieu of anything more elegant, Jaime slammed into the fish person- actually a fish man, he was unhappy to report. He added ‘no pants’ to the list of his personal issues with the fish people. Jaime grabbed the man- fish- guy firmly around the shoulders and dived, dropping him into the river. Behind him, the Posse was able to carve a path through.

“Scarab, can you tell me anything about those guys? Are they aliens or mutants, or what?” Jaime needed more information. I mean, yeah, there were all these fish people here, and he was totally capable of punching them. But that was the Guy Gardner way of dealing with a situation. Jaime preferred the Ted Kord way of dealing with his problems. _Why_ were there fish people in El Paso? Where did they come from? What did they want? And let’s start with, what exactly were they?

 _Opponents [human],_ Khaji Da supplied. “Human?” Jaime asked, flying back toward the bridge. He formed his right arm into the shape of a weapon that he’d read about in Ted Kord’s journals. “What do you mean? Why do they look like that, then?”

 _Somatic modification / addition of_ pylodictis olivaris _genetic material_. Jaime raised his hand and hit the closest fish person with a concentrated blast of light and air. The fish man went flying, clutching his eyes as he skidded across the pavement. “Wait, what?” Jaime asked, turning to blast another fish man away from one of the cars.

 _Opponents = part human / part flathead catfish_ , the scarab explained. _Likely explanation [gene/hormone manipulation]_. Jaime dived into the air, avoiding a couple of the fish people who had closed with him. He twisted, blasting them with his air gun.

“Hey, Beetle!” Paco called. “Little help?” Jaime’s attention snapped towards his friend, who was maybe a dozen yards away. Paco had gotten himself backed into a corner between two cars with a bunch of scared teenagers behind him. There were starting to be a totally unreasonable number of fish people on the bridge; they just kept climbing out of the river.

Jaime gunned it, flipping and landing in between Paco and the fish people. As he hit the ground, he flipped up his shield. Fish people battered against him. They actually smelled sort of fishy too, he noticed through the suit’s air filters. He gritted his teeth and settled himself more firmly. “Any idea about weaknesses?” he asked.

“Not sticks,” Paco supplied, ruefully.

 _Extreme low temperatures /_ pylodictis olivaris _= cold-blooded_ , Khaji Da put in, more helpfully.

Jaime nodded. “Paco- can you get these people out of here?”

Paco surveyed the situation. “Don’t worry- me and my stick can handle it. I can get us to Damper, and he can get us the rest of the way off.” He grinned. “Some cover would be nice, though.”

Jaime nodded. He kicked in the comm. “Brenda, where are you?”

“She’s here?” Paco said, alarmed. Jaime ignored him.

 _“I had to ditch my car,”_ she said. _“Traffic’s crazy going into the bridge. Are you guys okay?”_

“For the moment,” Jaime said. “How close are you to the customs station?”

 _“I can see it,”_ she said.

“Okay.” He looked at Paco. “Get ready to move,” he said.

Paco nodded, his face set. He gripped his stick a little tighter. “Ready when you are, Beetle.”

Jaime pulled his shield apart, catching the fish people off guard. Two of them fell forward. The others fell on Jaime, trying to pull his armor apart. They were strong, and it hurt. Jaime cried out, and then blasted into the air, spinning out of their grasp. He thumped down onto the ground, and let them have both barrels of his air-flash gun, pushing them away from Paco and the screaming teenagers he was escorting. Off to his right, he could see the barely-flickering presence of Damper.

Jaime spun, and pulled another pair of fish people away from Paco. He tried to drop them, but they held on for dear life. In his peripheral vision, though, he saw Paco reach Damper, and the not-quite-there of Damper’s perception field settle over him and the kids he was protecting. The fish people ignored them.

It would be nice if the fish people were ignoring him, too, Jaime reflected. He electrified his armor just slightly, and the two holding on to him twitched and thudded to the ground. Jaime jumped into the air, just out of their reach. “Okay,” he said. “Cold, huh?”

 _Ambient temperature < 40º Fahrenheit / 10 minutes for desired effect,_ Khaji Da replied helpfully.

“And we can do that?” Jaime said. He sort of assumed they could; Khaji Da didn’t usually suggest things unless they were possible.

 _Effect can be achieved,_ Khaji Da confirmed. _Requirement = massive power output / shutdown necessary._

“Wait, you mean the armor will shut down after we do the temperature change thing?” Jaime asked. “How long?”

It took a moment for Khaji Da to respond. _319 seconds._

“Okay,” Jaime said, and kicked open the commlink. “Brenda? Still there?”

 _“Duh,”_ she said, and waited.

“Two things: first, Paco and Damper are coming off the bridge in your direction soon. So keep an eye out for him, okay? Um, as much as you can. Given Damper’s thing.”

 _“Right, of course. What else?”_

“I need you to get someone a message for me,” he said. “I’d do it myself, but I’m about to be busy. I’m sending you the details now.” He paused. “Don’t let him intimidate you, okay?”

 _“Don’t let_ who _intimidate me- Jaime?”_

Once the information was sent to her phone, Jaime shut off the connection. He flew up, high enough to see the whole bridge. “The armor’s not going to shut down before I hit the ground, is it?” he asked, a little nervous.

 _Assurances / I will not let you fall,_ Khaji Da told him. It was a strangely sentimental thing for the scarab to say.

“Okay,” Jaime said. “Do it.”

The armor hummed, in the way that meant it was gearing up for something big. He could feel it rearranging around him. _Release = 5- 4- 3- 2- 1-_

Jaime tensed as the humming reached trigger pitch. It felt as though there was a pulse going through him all the way to his _teeth_ , and then _fwoom-_ it rushed out of him in a wave that he could feel out to his fingertips. Suddenly, the constant hum of the scarab and the armor in his mind was muted, and Jaime was falling.

Jaime struggled, panicking. Somewhere in the back of his head, it occurred to him that the YouTube videos of this were going to look really, really stupid. Then there was a burst of blue static, and the armor fired up long enough to catch him. Jaime landed on the bridge- not softly, but not hard enough to do more than bruise him, either. The armor shut down completely, leaving him lying gasping on the pavement in plain clothes.

Jaime realized three things fairly immediately. First, he really didn’t want his real face all over Homeland Security’s cameras. Second, there were fish people about to close on him. Third and last: for the next 312 seconds or so, he had no powers.

Okay. It was fine; Jaime had been in worse spots with no powers. And hey, at least he was dressed this time. He ripped a sleeve off his shirt and tied it around his face. Then he started running. All he had to do was not let fish people kill him long enough for the plan to work. He could do that- right?

He was pretty much the only not-fish person left on the bridge. The Border Patrol agents had already withdrawn, and all the civilians had been evacuated. Which left Jaime, and a whole bunch of fish people who were.... doing _what?_ Most of the fish people seemed to be wandering toward the American side of the bridge. That was interesting- even the ones who had climbed up on the Mexican side were still heading for the US. Jaime didn’t have much time to ponder that, though, because he was busy dodging one of the fish people, who had apparently decided to grab him.

Jaime dived under a car. _Five minutes_ , he thought. All he had to do was not get killed for five minutes, and he’d be home free-

There was the twisting, tortured sound of squealing metal, right over where Jaime was attempting to hide. A fish person was pulling the car apart. Really? That was completely unfair. Jaime tensed, and then pushed himself out from under the car, diving underneath another car on the other side, farther from the main crush of the assault. The air was growing distinctly chilly, and Jaime was starting to shiver a little.

How much time was left? Jaime wasn’t sure. He’d gotten out of the habit of carrying a watch or a phone or anything, since the scarab could do all of that for him. Still, he just had to hold out as long as it took-

There was a hand around his ankle, and he was dragged unceremoniously out from under the car he was hiding under, the concrete scraping painfully against his elbows and cheek. He was yanked up by his ankle and left staring upside down at another fish man. The fish man opened his mouth, working it silently. Jaime suddenly realized that they didn’t talk- or scream or grunt or anything. Did fish have voices?

Also, he should definitely be worrying about something else, because the fish man slammed him into the ground, and raised a webbed fist. “Khaji Da?” Jaime said, hopefully. “Now would be a great time-”

The fist slammed into him, and Jaime could taste blood. Crap. Jaime twisted, trying to remember Robin’s training. Don’t be where your opponent expects you to be, that was the first thing he could think of- but the fish man was faster and stronger than him, and Jaime suspected he might be nursing a concussion now. Jaime felt himself picked up and thrown. He sailed through the air for a split second before slamming into a car. The safety glass crunched behind him, and Jaime stumbled forward, trying to get his bearings.

The fish man came at him again. _Safety glass_ , Jaime thought. The fish man threw another punch. Jaime tensed, waited until the last moment, and then dropped to the ground, screwing his eyes shut. Above him, there was a shower of glass. As quick as he could, Jaime ducked away, not looking back. The glass might have slowed his opponent down or hurt him, but Jaime wasn’t sticking around to find out.

Unfortunately, the fish man who’d been punching Jaime wasn’t the only fish man on the bridge. Four more nearby turned to intercept him as he ran, their wide mouths open and flapping. One of them reached for him-

And Jaime felt the armor flow into place around him. _319 seconds,_ Khaji Da said, in his mind. Jaime blasted the fish people away from him and jumped into the air again. Jaime laughed. “It was a long five minutes,” he said, glad that the suit had healing abilities. He didn’t especially want to face his mom with a black eye. “Did it work?”

 _Ambient temperature = 53º and falling. Estimate 8.2 minutes / optimal metabolic slowdown._

Jaime looked down. Some of the fish people were already starting to move slower. The cold should make them sluggish and easier to deal with. Now, to see if the other part of the plan was going to work...

\---------------------------

There were a bunch of really big vans outside the customs station when Jaime touched down. There was also a Kryptonian hovering over them. “Hi!” Jaime said, surprised.

“Hi,” Superman said, with a friendly smile. “Batman called. He was busy, but he asked me to come.”

“Oh,” Jaime said, brilliantly. “I just wanted to make sure that someone was looking out for them,” he blurted out. “I didn’t want the government to just haul them off. The scarab says that they’re human; and there’s enough of them that I think they probably weren’t volunteers. They’re probably just victims of some dumbass supervillain’s plan, and I wanted to make sure that somebody was trying to help them.”

Superman nodded. “We’ll transport them to STAR labs,” he said. “If anyone can help them, they can.”

“Thanks,” Jaime said, watching Border Patrol load sleepy-looking fish people into the vans.

\-----------------------------------

Jaime changed back as he touched down in an alleyway, and made for Brenda and Paco. “Guys!” he called.

Brenda and Paco turned. Brenda was giving him a Death Glare. “Jaime Reyes,” she said, “The next time you decide it would be a good idea to turn off your comm and then fall out of the sky- _don’t._ ”

Jaime blushed. “Sorry,” he said, rubbing the back of his head with a hand.

Brenda crossed her arms. “I had to find out whether you’d died or not from _Twitter_ ," she said.

“I’m _really_ sorry?” he tried, looking to Paco for support.

Paco laughed. “Sorry, _mano_. I’m with her. Your mom called, by the way. The news cameras saw you go down.”

Jaime groaned. “Really?” He paused. “I don’t suppose one of you wants to invite me over for dinner tonight?”

Paco patted him on the back. “It’s okay,” he said. “She’ll probably be so happy you’re alive that she won’t even yell at you. Much.”

Brenda just put her fists on her hips. “Get in the car,” she said. “I promised your Mom I’d make sure you got home.” She paused. “Was that really _Batman_?” She added, in a small voice.

Paco jumped in next to her. “Wait, she got to talk to Batman? Why didn’t I get to talk to Batman?”

Jaime rolled his eyes and got in the car.


End file.
